No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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