She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Randomize