i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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