Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
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