If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize