Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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