We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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