Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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