Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize