after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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