I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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