Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
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