im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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