at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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