problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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