are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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