We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize