You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
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