She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize