I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
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