so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize