I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
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