The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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