Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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