If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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