She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize