Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
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I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
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His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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