Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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