I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
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