Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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