Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
My sheets look like a crime scene.
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
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