new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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