My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Randomize