Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize