I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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