Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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