Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
she smelled like a LAN party
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize