She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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