After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Randomize