there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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