Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize