Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Naked Twister starts at high noon
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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