weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
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You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
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was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
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