Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
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my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
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I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
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