Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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