you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Randomize