Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize