question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
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