your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
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But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
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Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
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