Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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